


white wedding

by SbiderSlut (BlackCoffeeCat)



Series: The Sad Starker Trash Bin [2]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Bittersweet Ending, Catharsis, M/M, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-01
Updated: 2018-12-01
Packaged: 2019-08-23 01:24:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16609199
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackCoffeeCat/pseuds/SbiderSlut
Summary: Tony could easily imagine how he would turn out: bitter, old, disillusioned, and having lost too many things he’d loved. He knew his shitty life choices would never lead him to a happy ending.He'd just never thought that he’d lose the thing he loved most because he made the decent choice. Over and over again.He never thought he’d hurt this much yet feel so happy, giving Peter away at his wedding.---Or: Tony, Peter, and a wedding -- but not their's.





	white wedding

**Author's Note:**

> Any of y'all seen New Girl? Remember that episode where Nick and Jess FINALLY kiss? Remember that one chick they picked up at the bar who's sexually aroused by sad shit? 
> 
> That's me. Hence, my explanation for everything below. 
> 
> I wanted to see if I could write something that's ambiguously happy, but in a way that's a little fucking sad. Whether I succeeded or not is totally up for you to decide, but I tried. It was challenging. So I'm cool with the outcome :) 
> 
> Hope you enjoy!
> 
> A big, loving thanks to [Kingfisherwoes](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kingfisherwoes), who is the real MVP and helped me get this sad garbage sorted out into something readable! At this point, any errors are literally just my fault XD

_the end:_

Peter looks breathtaking in white.

It’s a good choice for them. Peter’s already seen so much death and darkness in his life. He'd been adamant that he wanted a wedding with only light colors. And Dan, being the adoring type of fiancé that any parent would wish for their own child, had wholeheartedly agreed.

So theirs is a white wedding.

And Peter makes the most beautiful groom.

His tux is a crisp, bright white with a svelte figure and sharp lines. It does a flawless job of emphasizing Peter's lean figure -- the slim length of his legs, the graceful breadth of his shoulders. 

The underneath is white as well, which -- on paper -- should have been too much. Tony had been skeptical in the beginning, but both Peter and May had been adamant. Pepper had been cautiously optimistic. And between the four of them, they had made it work.

If there's anyone in the universe who deserves a perfect, fairytale wedding of his dreams, it's Peter Parker. If Peter had wanted a Game of Thrones wedding with three goddamn dragons, Tony would have biologically engineered a new species.

“Uh, Tony?” he asks, looking down at himself in confusion, which snaps Tony right out of his stupor. “Is there something wrong with the suit?”

“No, no,” Tony quickly reassures him. “You look fine. Amazing. Groom of the year.” _Not mine, though._ “ _Vogue Weddings_ worthy.”

“Uh,” Peter says, blushing. “Thanks! I’m glad!”

“Yeah, no problemo. And look at you, you tied it perfectly.” Awkwardly, Tony gestures toward Peter’s neck.

Peter smiles, incandescently bright. “I learned from the best,” he says, which in turn, makes Tony’s stomach clench.

That had been Tony. As Peter encountered different life experiences throughout the years, he had relied on Tony to show him how to tie an assortment of knots -- including the flawless Eldredge he’s currently sporting.

A silence falls over them as they face each other. It's not long at all, but long enough that Tony processes where he’s at and what he’s about to do.

How he’s about to lose something that was never truly his, to begin with.

It’s a bitter taste, nonetheless.

But Peter -- despite his knowing what never was and that bare trace of regret which will always linger for the both of them -- glows. He radiates happiness.

It’s Peter's white wedding. He’s marrying someone he loves, and who loves him the way he deserves -- who cares for him in a way the universe owes him, after all the trials and tribulations it has forced Peter to endure.

This is everything that Peter deserves.

So, Tony matches Peter’s bright smile with his own and claps the kid on the shoulder. “How are you feeling, kiddo?”

“Brilliant,” Peter murmurs, visibly thrumming with joy.

 _Yes, you are,_ Tony thinks. Peter’s happiness is contagious and floods Tony, too, soothing him where he’s raw and hurting, and filling out the cracks where his heart’s been broken before.

This, this is good.

“I’m so happy, Tony. I never thought I’d feel so happy. I. Just.” Peter laughs, giggles, and flaps his hands in a flurry of excitement. “Gosh.” He blinks and exhales, eyes bright and suspiciously shiny.

“Hey, hey, no tears, buddy,” Tony says, then, reaching forward and steadying Peter with two firm hands placed on the pristine white shoulders of Peter’s tux. “You don’t want to look puffy on your wedding day, right?”

“Of course, of course,” Peter laughs. He sniffles once and takes a deep breath. “Okay. I’m good. This is happening.” He looks at Tony with big eyes. “This is happening, Tony. I’m getting married.”

“Yes, yes you are,” Tony says. “You’re tying the knot, kiddo. And with one hell of a great guy, too. I’m happy for you. I’m proud of you.”

“Really?” Peter asks, lips quirking in a small smile.

Half of his question sounds like the Peter of before, who loves hearing how proud Tony is of him. Who’s too shy and humble to ask, but will subtly try and get Tony to repeat himself. There’ll always be a hint of Peter in there that is reminiscent of the sweet, sweet child who stumbled into Tony’s chaotic life in a tangle of webs and puppy eyes.

But, the other half is an older, wiser Peter -- a Peter who’s flirted with heartache and heartbreak and who’s loved Tony and recognized, on some level, a reciprocation. Peter knows the unfulfilled potential they’ve let pass.

So that one uttered word makes one hell of a loaded question.

And Tony knows his answer.

“Yes,” he says, without hesitation.

Despite everything, Tony is a proud mentor and father. He’s never not been. Perhaps other things got in the way and overlapped, even overwhelmed, but that first love of _mentor and mentee_ \-- of _father and son?_ That never abandoned them.

It’s not something Tony ever wanted to address, let alone at a wedding, but if he leaves the subject like this, they might never find peace.

Peter might never get the closure he needs.

The closure they _both_ need.

“It’s your wedding, Pete," Tony says gently, "and I refuse to detract from it in any way by addressing what we’ve both spent far too long mulling over. But I’ll tell you this.”

He waits, patiently, for Peter to meet his eyes. In that moment, Peter’s sixteen and in his lab again, shy and unsure of whatever answer he’s given.  

And Tony does what he’s always endeavored to do -- smile, wait patiently, and allow Peter the time to muster up his own confidence. That’s what he’s always believed in: being a steadfast presence in Peter’s life while still allowing the kid room to become his own person.

Peter meets his eyes with confidence now, and that’s one way in which Tony’s done right in some tiny, tiny way.  

“Yes?” Peter asks, expectantly. Assuredly. Without hesitation. 

 _That's my boy,_ Tony thinks, and he smiles. “Whatever happened," he says, "and whatever could have happened, none of that matters anymore. We’re here, now. You’re marrying a great man, and you’re happy, and because of that, I’m happy. It’s as simple as that.”

It really is as simple as that. 

Sure, the air between them is rife with missed chances and lost opportunities, but those raw gaps became openings for better ones. Well, for Peter, at least. And it’s always been about Peter -- only Peter -- in Tony’s mind. If there’s one good thing that’s come out of their history, it’s that Tony’s truly learned what unconditional, selfless love means.

It means letting go of what he loves because that person can find something better.

It means recognizing when what's best for them isn't what's best for him, and always putting them first.

It's not hesitating the slightest when choosing between his own happiness and theirs, even if he's letting go of the thing most precious to him.

And that’s exactly what Tony did. He’s proud of it. He’s sure of it. 

It’ll hurt for the rest of his life, and he’ll never regret it for one second.

“However I may have felt before,” he rushes out, trying not to linger on raw nerves that will never truly heal, “and however I may feel in the future, I always have, and always will be the man who wants what’s best for you before anything else. And this is...honestly the best I can imagine. So, I wouldn’t trade this for anything.” Tony pauses and takes a deep, calming breath. “Would you?” he finally asks Peter.

Sure, he already knows what the answer will be, and so does Peter. But he also _knows_ Peter -- arguably better than anyone, save two or three people. And he wouldn’t deserve to walk the kid down the aisle if he didn’t know by now that Peter often needs to hear himself say out loud what he already innately knows.

“I wouldn’t, either,” Peter agrees, expression open and honest. He looks down for a moment, somber, taking the overdue moment he needs to finally bid farewell to what they should have let go of long ago. And then, he looks up with a soft smile. “You know, I love you, Tony. I loved you first. That’s not something that goes away.”

He says the words with heartfelt sincerity and not a hint of shame. That, more than anything, makes Tony’s heart swell.

“It really doesn’t, kid,” Tony agrees. It’s as close to a confession as he’ll ever allow himself.

Peter smiles, gently, in warm understanding. “And I only love you more,” he tells Tony, “because you allowed me the chance to find more people to love. And I found someone who matches the person I am. Someone who won’t have to compromise himself for me, and who I won’t have to compromise myself for. That’s the dream, isn’t it?”

 _It is,_ Tony thinks. 

Peter pauses, looks down, and lets out a huff of laughter. “You could say that you were my Prince Charming, you know?” he remarks, voice soft. “But you loved me enough that you didn’t want me confined to a castle and a role. And that’s the greatest give you could have given me. So, I regret nothing, and I’m so, so happy, and I'll love you forever for what you've given me. I need you to know that. And I’m so glad you’re here to walk me down the aisle because I couldn’t imagine this without you.”

Oh, great, now there’s a lump. And a slight stinging at his eyes. They’re really going all the way with these emotions today. Tony clears his throat, reaches out, and makes a fuss of Peter’s cufflinks. “All your hand-waving earlier,” he mutters, while Peter looks on fondly. “You can’t look like a heathen at your own damn wedding.”

“No, Sir,” Peter laughs, humoring the mother-henning as Tony reaches out and adjusts every little detail he can -- the shoulders of the tux, the shirt collar, that barely-there wrinkle on his left bicep, the pocket square, the floral corsage. “Of course not.”

“Watch it, you,” Tony snarks, and he steps back. For a moment, he simply _looks_.

Peter’s a complete vision, with glowing, pink cheeks and a warm, content energy to him that practically overflows from his beaming smile and twinkling eyes.  

There’s nothing else left to adjust.    

This is it.

And Tony is... good. Great, even.

Despite all this hurts that he can’t ever give voice to and will undoubtedly carry for the rest of his life, he’s content and at peace. If he couldn’t have any number of things he desperately wanted, he’s still going to walk this boy who holds his heart down the aisle. 

He’s still giving away his heart to someone who is worthy and will take good care of it.

So he smiles, offers his elbow, and gestures towards the door with a jerk of the head. “You ready to get this show on the road?”

Peter smiles and steps forward, linking his arm through Tony’s. “I am,” he says. “Let’s do this.”

\---

As they watch the newlywed couple dance, Pepper steps up beside him. “They’re beautiful, aren’t they?” she murmurs with a soft, adoring look.  

“Yes,” Tony agrees. “They are.” He and Pepper share a smile, and he takes a moment to bask in how much he appreciates her. 

After everything that’s happened, Pepper’s become such an integral and inseparable piece of his life; her presence feels like that first, deep breath after a long time away from home.

She’s home, in many different ways.    

What a pair they make. Him, a superhero with a world to save. Her, a CEO and global figure, with a world to change. 

They’ve both had their fair share of heartbreaks. They've both missed out on opportunities -- let go of their own happiness for a greater good. Neither Pepper’s first nor second engagement culminated in marriage, and those lost opportunities show in the few graceful wrinkles that adorn her fetching features.

They’re both older than they once were. Tony can barely imagine how it felt when he and Pepper were young and ambitious and in constant movement. They’ve mellowed out and grown weary under the weight of the world.

But, they both smile as Peter throws his head back and laughs at something Dan murmurs in private. They both feel warm affection as they observe the way Dan smiles as he watches his husband’s unrestrained and unabashed joy. It's a look full of unspoken adoration and devotion. 

Dan is someone who's seen Peter through and through -- who understands all the different facets of a man who juggles multiple duties and identities. And Dan cherishes each and every one of those facets unconditionally and most ardently, in the way Peter Parker deserves to be cherished. 

Looking at Peter and Dan, Tony knows that the future is good. They’re an accomplished duo in many respects -- both predominant figures in their academic fields. And they love each other in ways that very few people are lucky enough to find.

Peter is in good hands. 

So is Dan.

They took a different path than what he and Pepper found for themselves, and Tony is grateful. He doesn’t regret his own life choices. And Pepper doesn’t, either, he knows. It’s what the world needed, and it’s what they were meant to do.

He’s just glad that Peter found something happier and more promising -- far more promising than anything Tony could have offered him.  

And now, he and Pepper stand, a woman respected by the entire world, and a man who’s found his own, strange version of peace.

“I’m glad you’re here, Pep,” he murmurs. “There’s nobody I’d rather spend this moment with. You’re my constant, you know?”

“I know,” Pepper says, bumping her shoulder against him. “You’re my insufferable constant, too.”

Sure, neither of them manage to fix all their broken bits and pieces. Most people can’t. That's just life.

But, that’s alright -- because they are, for the most part, happy.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Any comments and feedback are wildly appreciated! 
> 
> And I'm very SORRY there's no truly happy ending here. Feel free to yell at me :'(
> 
> I realize this was a shitty way to start December, but now that this is out of the way, I can ACTUALLY sorta focus on smutty Christmas goodness <3 <3
> 
> \--
> 
> I am [SbiderSlut](http://sbiderslut.tumblr.com/) on Tumblr. Come by and say hi! 💖💕


End file.
